Words from a Shepherd’s Heart

#4 Hidden Areas of Growth

Happy New Year! What are your traditions around the New Year? It’s great to take time, annually, and think about the year we’ve just completed. We may do this at other times of the year as well, such as our birthday, an anniversary, or the beginning or end of a school semester. It can be a time to reflect on what we have accomplished and look ahead to where we would like to go. We can consider whether we’ve seen personal growth in different areas of our lives or relationships. For our children, we may have a place to mark off how much they’ve grown in the year; or talk about how they’ve developed, what they’ve accomplished, and celebrate who they are becoming.

For some this may seem like a useless exercise. We may feel that it’s obvious what has happened; what we have or have not accomplished. Or we may be discouraged, thinking of the things we had hoped to do and never did. Looking back can be painful, discouraging, or just plain frustrating.

I’ve discovered the benefits of looking back with the help of others. My Spiritual Director is great at putting together pieces I hadn’t connected before, noting areas of growth and change. She can better see what God has been doing in my life, at times, than I can. What seems like an ordinary year suddenly takes on a whole new perspective as the winding path of life reveals a thread of purpose and meaning that was hidden.

This is something that you can do as a family as well. Here are some questions you can reflect on together. Think about them individually and then comment on them for each other, noting areas of growth that you have seen in the lives of your family members. You may be surprised at what comes out of this practice. If it’s challenging to do this all in one sitting, consider journaling your own answers and writing a letter to each family member. This could become a wonderful way you bless and encourage each other.

Questions to consider
Personal Questions
  1. How have I grown in my relationship with God? Am I able to love more like Jesus? Are there areas of my life that I can see the fruit of God’s Spirit growing?
  2. How have I grown in my relationship with others? Have I been able to practice forgiveness more readily? Am I becoming more patient with certain people?
  3. What have I accomplished this past year that I’m really proud of? How has this been significant in my life? How has God used this area of my life to bless others?
  4. What is an area of my life where I sense God is challenging me to grow? How can I give him room this year to make this happen?
  5. What is one hope or dream I have for this year?
Group Questions – try and answer these for each of the members of your immediate family
  1. How have you seen the others in your family grow in their relationship with God this year?
  2. How have they grown in their relationship with you this past year? Are there things they do that encourage you and show you love?
  3. What about them makes you feel proud that you know them, that they are a part of your family?
  4. What is one hope or dream that you have for the others in your family?

We need to acknowledge that we are all on a journey of growth. It may not always seem obvious but practicing an exercise like this can help us become more intentional in how we want to grow. It can also cause us to turn to God for help in knowing what our next steps are. We can model this for our children by speaking into their lives and allowing them to speak into our lives. Through this we can see how God is shaping us. What a wonderful gift to be able to discover this together.

Sarah Cogswell

Sarah Cogswell is Pastor of Children and Families at The Journey Church in Moncton, NB, Canada. She and her husband David have been married for 23 years and are parents to three amazing teenage boys. She spent 9 years caring for children in her home, and has hosted 17 international students throughout the years. She is currently working on her Master of Divinity through Acadia Divinity College and enjoys learning and experiencing ministry and faith all at the same time. You can contact Sarah by emailing sarah@onthejourney.ca.